The "It's Who You Know" Myth

I must have heard this hundreds of times over the years: "It's not what you know, it's who you know."

And while there may an element of truth to this, it seems like a damn fine excuse for anyone who isn't born into the right social circle...

"It's not my fault I can't get ahead. I just don't have the right contacts"

"John is so lucky. But he did have the contacts, after all, didn't he"

"What do you expect? I wasn't born with a silver spoon in my mouth"

... of course, there are a million different 'excuse variations', but they all have one thing in common.

They hold you back.

Don't get me wrong. Some people do get luckier than others. For instance, I know someone who was handed a business from a family member... got free rent for months... and had dozens upon dozens of pre-qualified clients sent his way.

No prospecting... no hard knocks... just hang out your shingle and you're on your way.

But most of us don't have it quite that easy.

You and I have to hustle. You and I have to work hard. You and I have to put in the hours to get ahead. You and I have to think hard on a daily basis.

But you and I should not EVER fall into the victim thinking that we can't succeed because we're not in the right social circle.

There is another way.

I call it the "What you know determines who you know" philosophy.

And it's worked for me.

Here's what I mean: the contacts you make are determined by what you know.

For instance, as a copywriter, I now have many well known friends and acquaintances in the direct marketing circle.

And the reason we make time for each other is because we both know something which can help each other out.

But the truth is "If I didn't know anything about direct response marketing, I wouldn't have that relationship with them."

If all I wanted to do was call up and chat with them about nothing or TAKE... TAKE... TAKE... and not give anything in return, obviously they wouldn't return my calls and the relationship would not be there.

And when you consider there are six degrees of separation between you and anyone else on the planet, once you
have a handful of contacts, it's not hard to get in touch with virtually anyone... if you really set your mind to it.

And that's why WHAT you know determines WHO you know.

But I'm not just talking so much about university education that everyone else knows. I am also referring to getting information nobody else knows. I am talking about being able to add so much value to other people that they want to keep you in their "inner circle" of contacts.

Because we're all busy. And successful people are even busier. Therefore if you want to know them and get all of the advantages of being in the "inner circle" you need to know stuff other people don't know.

Stuff which you can find at this web site (or this one ) which not 1 in 100 business owners truly understands.

Anyway, this is an important point we all must keep in mind for the rest of our lives:

What we know determines who we know.

Print it out and tape it up on the wall next to your computer for a month if you want to ensure you don't forget it.

Scott Bywater is a direct response copywriter with extensive experience in B2B and B2C writing. Mr Bywater is the author of Cash-Flow Advertising and More Customers Made Easy. You can gain access to his copywriting and marketing tips via his entertaining and eye opening "Copywriting Selling Secrets" newsletter available at

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