Judge: If this trial is interrupted by anyone, that person will be thrown right out of this courtroom.
Prisoner: Hooray for the Judge!

Prosecutor: What were you doing on July 15 at 9 o'clock in the evening?
Prisoner: I was eating hamburger.
Prosecutor: What were you doing at 9:30 p.m.?
Prisoner: I was taking a bicarbonate of soda.
Prosecutor: Do you expect us to believe you?
Prisoner: You would if you had eaten one of those hamburgers.

Woman: Your Honor, the accident was unavoidable. I had to run into the fence to keep from hitting the cow.
Judge: Was it a Jersey Cow?
Woman: I don't know. I didn't see any license plates.

The Golden Rule is: Whoever finds gold first keeps it!!!

Poetic license is a license you get so that you can write poetry

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